redneck crop circles

Yeah, You think his tractor’s sexy. Steven and I have been watching with great interest the saga of my Uncle “Kneebaby” and the grass next door. My Uncle Dewey lives next door along with my Aunt, and my cousin, her husband and thier daughter. The lawnscaping next door,  or lack there-of has been a subjest of much discussion around here. While we arent perfect neighbors.. (our dog barks, we have kids on bikes and we leave for work at 0′dark thirty. ) we usually keep our grass cut.

RECENTLY the grass next door had begun to look like my cousin was going into hay farming. It was almost thigh high in places! Every time we went outside I imagined the creatures that were lurking in that grass. Then one day, my Uncle decided to get out and swath/bale the grass. It litterally took him a whole afternoon to get through it. Over the next few days he raked it into strange little haystacks all over the place. Then for no apparent reason his days as lawnscaper were over. The mounds stayed in place…for two weeks, I was actually a little afraid that they might spontaniously combust. Until yesterday late afternoon when he suddenly returned to work.. (the grass was growing up around the haystacks) I watched him move the stacks around a little and then I saw the redneck wheels start to turn.. He knealt at each haymound and lit it on fire….and while Im sure the concept was sound? The execution was terrible.

The “hay” after sitting in the damp fall air for a couple of weeks was wet..  I really wish Id taken a picture. The whole 1/2 acre looked like a wigwam indian village sending up smoke signals. There was no wind last night and the rancid wet grass smoke lay in layers over the whole neighborhood.

Today? The process began again with my uncle cutting crop circles in the knee high grass , in and around the half burnt and still smoldering haystacks from the last time he cut grass. ahhh redneck entertainment.